Lost "Through The Looking Glass"

TEASER I'm freaking out already. This show needs to be impregnated by me, I love it so much. I can't even think about that crazy flashback with a bearded Jack and near suicide. What's important? JINN SPEAKS ENGLISH! Ah finally! And truer words have never been spoken! The dedication that these characters have for each other, something that I am amazed by. Hurley and Claire missing Charlie, Sayid talking to Jack, Rose to Bernard ("I'm a dentist, I am not Rambo")! I'm already freaking out, I don't think I can handle the next hour and fifty minutes.

ACT ONE I'm seriously pissed at my TV. It's snowy and I'm squinting. I'm squinting and I hear explosions and people possibly dying! Okay so, Naomi doesn't trust Juliette and I really don't trust Naomi. She's way too pretty, fell out of the sky, it reeks of deus ex machina. Plus, she healed at Wolverine speed. Second, I love that the Looking Glass Babes called Charlie one of "them." Way to keep that theme of "them" and "other" going, Cuse and Lindelof! Ben is batshit crazy, straight up, and that I can tell even through the blizzard on my TV. I'm fearing for Juliet; I feel revengeance from Ben! Um, and, yeah, that last minute or so. I cannot have Jinn or Sayid die. I feel like Bernard and Rose are easy targets just because they're not regulars.

ACT TWO Okay, how exactly can ones heart hold up during this? Sure, Bernard is a straight up pussy for telling everything and he's just put Rose and the others (see, I just used it) in danger...BUT...he is just a dentist. He did what Rose said. Yeah, I have a soft spot for wusses in stories because, honestly, I'd probably do the same thing (never get trapped on an island with me). I was seriously thinking I was going to see Jinn brains all over the beach. And how much head trauma can Sayid take? It's really time for him to go bonanza on all of these guys. He was trained to be a killing machine (or something), let's see him do some killing. Starting with that other guy, not Tom. I like Tom. Oddly. And was Jack's ex-wife pregnant? I can't tell with my TV but she really looked bump-y. And Charlie is so confident now that he doesn't care about dying. Maybe those girls will like the confidence and Charlie can get a good bye threesome. One of them is named Bonnie, I think. Was that Ben's girl's name? I don't think so?

ACT THREE And if they get off the island, first order of business for Kate? A guest spot on Maury Povich to make Sawyer PAY UP! He is sleepwalking and trotting dangerously close to Checked Out mode. He's pretty high up on my list of those to die, which is really no good. I can't wait to see Ben and Alex go on thier bonding backpacking trip. It'll be like A Goofy Movie except with a megalomaniac and no quasi-hip rap tracks. Kudos to Desmond for making it safely into The Looking Glass. I can't open my eyes underwater so I would be absolutely useless. Once again, I hope I never am stranded on an island.

Oh yeah, isn't Americal Idol ending at some point? I wish a cross-network promotional stunt would find the Others kidnapping Blake and messing with his ovaries...or really just something horrible. I don't like him.


ACT FOUR Boo ya Kate! You chose Sawyer, you guys are perfectly miserable together, stop pining for Jack. That was a satisfying kiss. I think Jack and Juliet have great chemistry (cheesy boat trip ending of that tattoo episode aside) and they have been through H.E.L.L. And yes, Juliet, you do have to go back. You're a big part of the current problem. I'm glad she's taking responsibility and stepping up to the plate. With Sawyer. Who I have marked for death (nooo!). So...they go back and both die, that's my theory. Did I mention I love Charlie? He's doing great. If I didn't squeal, I'd probably be as downright annoying as he is being if I were captured (I'm never flying again so I won't risk being stranded somewhere). I love the seeds of distrust being planted all up in the Looking Glass. I don't know if Mikhail is going to trust Ben now or not, but apparently Bonnie or The Other Girl is like that lady in T3; a total killing machine. At least that's what I gathered by the "you'd already be dead" comment.

ACT FIVE Walt has a man voice now! Or one in the making...I guess forced perspective and baggy clothes hide aging on the island. I'm freaked out a bit right now. Locke sees lost losties a lot (Boone before this). I wonder if there's a connection or if Walt has a bigger purpose. Is he Jacob, maybe? A vessel for him? And Hurley! I've had weird feelings about him being evil or that he might betray the gang. I don't know why, he's been acting weird ever since his van episode. Now he's been turned away by Sawyer...oy vey! He looked so upset and I don't want him to do anything rash. I really really like Hurley; so far he's been the only honest-to-goodness nice guy on the show. By the way, Jack was a hardcore drug addict and loser back in the day. Does he want to save that chick's life so she'll marry him since it happened once before? And no guns. Great, Juliet, lying again. At least she's hilarious ("You screwing Jack yet?") and lying for the right reasons.

Halfway through the finale and no one is dead yet. I'm putting money (blog money) on Sawyer, Juliet, Bernard, Jinn, Desmond, Mikhail. THose were quickly made!

ACT SIX A middle-aged man with a cane and no sign of muscle mass has never looked that intimidating. Showdown of the series about to happen. Oh, and, KILL THE LOVE TRIANGLE! Ugh! I mean, yeah, we've all known Jack has had a hard-on for Kate since the first episode (sutures do that, you know) and yeah, I know it wasn't going to be easy for him to get over her. But like, he's fine with Juliet. She's fine with Sawyer. Now that he's dropped the L-Bomb, she's going to ditch Sawyer straight up (and since both he and Juliet are probably going to die...). Okay...maybe if they do die, Jack and Kate can hook up and all this will end. The casket is a total mystery, but he's stressed out enough to be strung out about it. Neither friend nor family with no visitors? Could it be Alvar Hanso? Would that be crazy?

ACT SEVEN I'm dead inside. I don't trust the deaths of Sayid, Bernard and Jinn until I see their bodies, but Ben looks like a goner. And Mikhail too. Oh I'm just exhausted, that was intense. I've never, television has never been like this. I like that Ben has a motive now though and really, can't trust Naomi. She fell from the sky. I remember that Ben did too. I just, wow....Sayid! Without Sayid these guys are really, really lost. It's totally possible that Tom killed the other survivors, I dunno. I'm kinda nauseous.

ACT EIGHT YES! I just, I love Hurley. That was one of the most unexpected and downright exhilirating rescues I've seen in a while. Yes, Sayid, you kill him with your FEET! That's right! Sayid is merciless! And Sawyer, oh Sawyer, thank you for coming back. "That's for taking the kid off the raft." I forgot how Tom was the face of evil for season two, how we all thought he was the head other. His possible foppishness aside, he deserves what he got. ESPECIALLY from Sawyer. I love a good call back and that was a good call back. So the death count is up to seven random others, both Looking Glass Girls, Mikhail (maybe), and...that's it so far. Not that shocking. I love that only a musician can enter in the code. Great. It is Charlie's destiny.

ACT NINE No! There are TEARS! There are tears in my EYES! No, curses! Charlie! No no no! Such a great character, this was the obvious thing darnit! You're supposed to shock me and kill someone else! I knew Mikhail wasn't dead; he better be now. And no, darnit no no no, not Penny's boat? Not Penny's boat! I can't stand this! Things are now going so wrong! And Hurley, who knows if he may betray all of them on the beach for a last minute switcheroo. I bet the last shocker will be that they are all captured and all of next season is the entire cast being held prisoner on that boat. I hate Naomi. And I hate that it looks like Ben is right. W. T. F. I'm not feeling well.

ACT TEN I wish I had posted this earlier because now I'm going to seem like a total liar, but I was wondering if we were seeing a flash forward. Yeah, this is on the level of Sidney Bristow waking up after being dead for two years, maybe even more shocking. I have a lot of faith in this show and I know they know what they're doing. I do think that the flashback formula was getting a bit stale. Still great, mind you, but it's nice to ditch it while they're still interesting. I'm only worried about what flashing forward does to the dramatic narrative of the show. For instance, we now know that Jack and Kate are absolutely safe until the very last episode (unless the island time ends up catching up with the flash forward time). That's a weird feeling since I was actually pretty sure Locke was going to shoot the bejeezus out of him. I'm also concerned about my own mental health, now that I'll be trying to juggle the past, present, and future all at once. Thanks, Lost, for assuming that I'm smart!

So that was that. An absolutely stellar season comes to a close with a full on amazing season finale and a trip to crazy town in the last five minutes. I'm actually upset at the lack of death. I got emotionally toyed with for two hours, yes, but only one death to show for it. Cuse and Lindelof have really set the bar high now. Keeping dramatic tension when we know that they get off the island and that future flash forwards, if handled like the flashbacks, are going to guarantee the safety of everyone they touch. This show is approaching a shark and it's going to absolutely insane to see what they do with that shark next season. I hope they plow through it because I would hate for Lost to jump it.

MY SCORE: **** (out of 5)